How does a person develop confidence? Without getting too philosophical about it, I think it has a lot to do with how much encouragement they are given. As encouraging words are spoken over them, they aspire to greater things and are moved to take action. They are sparked to develop a sense of who they are.
A high school student was working at the nail salon today. She was a vibrant young woman, finishing up her co-op in order to graduate this June. She greeted me with a smile and wanted so much to show me how much she cared about her work. The ladies were running behind schedule. She took the initiative to begin to remove my nail polish in an attempt to save time for me and for her employer. In a panicky yelp, “Linda” said, “NO! NO! NO!” The young woman was a bit embarrassed but she didn’t let that stop her. The phone rang and she jumped up to answer it but as her boss saw that her protégée was about to pick up the line again she yelped and grabbed the phone away.
I won’t bore you with all the details of my hour at the nail salon but let me tell you this much, by the time I left this young and vibrant young woman had lost whatever confidence and initiative she had when I first walked in. No one wanted to trust her with any amount of responsibility. She felt rejected and I felt rejected for her. Truly, how can you mess up removing nail polish or answering a phone, (no one knows more about these things than teenaged girls)! My heart was broken for her.
An encouraging word and a modicum of trust go a long way; it tells people that we believe in them. It builds their confidence and gives them reason to pursue bigger and better things. I wonder if her spirit was permanently damaged by today. I wonder if she’ll remember how she felt in years to come. Will anyone ever ask her, “Why don’t you ever take any initiative?” I pray those words and the tone they were spoken in will simply roll off her like water on a duck’s back. Let’s all be more careful, especially with the young men and women loaded with responsibilities to take us into the future.
