Unveiling Hope

Arise

 Have you ever had one of those rests where you know you rested well, but you want to stay in hibernation? 

I took a break from blogging, any many other things last November, because I really felt that I was being called to do some intimate relationship building which, in my case, required a significant amount of time, and my complete focus. 

I have lived wrapped in the shadow of His wings for the last six months and I can’t think of any place better to exist. I didn’t stop taking care of my family and I didn’t stop working. Though I was, for a period, in hibernation – I was never is isolation. We were made to be in communion – first with Him and then with others.

He has taught me how to be in intimate relationship with Him every moment of every day no matter where I am or what I am doing. This had been something I had been crying out to Him about for a long time. Imagine calling a significant other, a parent, or a good friend and saying “I need you! I want to spend time with you! I feel unloved and ignored! Please help me! Please spend some quality time with me!” Now, imagine if they respond positively to your request – they are thrilled that you’ve called on them – but every time they invite you, you’re already busy… Who suffers?

Someone recently commented, “I wish I had the time to be intimate with Him for six months.” Ah, hold on a minute, friend. You do. When we “live” in the world, it seems that the greatest complaint many believers have is a lack of time to devote to being with the One who made them, the One who made their time. How easy it is to forget that we were made to worship Him. We were made to bring Him glory. We were made by Him and for Him; how can we not make time to be in an intimate with Him? He made our time, but we are given the choice as to how we will use it. My relationship began to suffer when I found myself trying to “fit” Him into my schedule. I invested time in my relationship (what I felt lead to give) and He’s been blessing me with dividends on my investment ever since.

During these last months, I feel as if I have fallen in love with my Lord. Suddenly, all the things I used to cut short to squeeze Him in seem insignificant in light of our rekindled love. I still have time to do all that needs getting done and if something doesn’t get done, then I have no doubt that it never needed doing in the first place.

“But seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be added to you.” Matt. 6:33 ESV.

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The Beginning - Part V

Even had I wanted to turn back, my feet would not allow it. They had charge over my entire body. My heart beat so loudly; it resonated through the ground. I was sure he could hear me coming. I was glad, but I was tentative. He was looking upon the water. Our spirits spoke to each other as I made my descent. His arm reached out slowly, his hand reaching for mine as if it was waiting for me. I heard a small still voice within me whisper, “Come to me. Come to me.” He stood and began to walk in my direction. I didn’t understand why, and I didn’t care. All I knew was that everything inside me wanted to run to him.

She was more resplendent than anything I had ever seen. She was ready. There was nothing more urgent for her than to be in my arms where she belonged. She wanted to run to me. I smiled at her, inviting her to take my hand. This was the moment I had waited for yet it was just the beginning.

He was magnificent. There was nothing left inside me to hold me back – I wanted nothing more than to let go – let go of anything and everything that had ever kept us apart. This was the moment I had waited for. My purpose, the reason for my creation, was unfolding.

She ran into my arms. I held her. I held her so tightly, tightly but gently – reassuringly. I wanted her to be confident in my love. I wanted her to know that, from this point on, I would never let her go. I loved her more than I loved my own life. I would lay it down for her and her alone and I needed for her to know that. I needed for her to understand that. Yet how could she? She was mine, finally. I’ll spend the rest of my days living to show her that I am completely hers.

I wanted him. I needed him. I knew as I began to run toward him that I had found the one I had been looking for. I had found what had been missing, what had kept me from being fully alive. I had no shame. I was spiritually naked before him, hiding nothing. I sensed that he knew more about me than I knew about myself. I felt loved, so loved by him. I knew he would have sacrificed everything, his very life, to express that love. I knew I’d never fully understand. I gave him my heart. I gave him my mind and my soul with every bit of strength I had. I knew, as I stood there, wrapped inside his arms sheltered beneath his wing, that I would spend the rest of my days living to show him that I am completely his.

The Decision - Part IV

She picked herself up and began to walk in my direction, though she hadn’t yet seen me. I knew I would surprise her. I knew she would have doubts and wonder who I was. For a brief instant she would feel unsafe, unsure of herself, unsure of me, but it wouldn’t last. It was me she had set out to encounter when she began the journey. Ah, she noticed me. I pretended not to notice her, to give her time to process what she was feeling and thinking. Her mind was cautious. Her heart was intrigued. Her spirit knew me. Her spirit recognized me. Everything inside me wanted to run to her, to pick her up in my arms and hold her, to melt away every little bit of pain and doubt, to answer every question, but I knew I had to move slowly. I had to let her come to me and she would, sooner rather than later. The course had been set; she was already out of the starting blocks. She wasn’t about to turn back now.

I saw him sitting beneath the willow tree, on the bank of the river that had been calling me. My spirit longed to approach him, but my mind was tentative. Who was he? Why was he there? Was he waiting for me? He hadn’t noticed me. I was glad. I wasn’t sure about what to do next. Should I keep walking to the river? Should I say hello? Something inside me kept telling me that he had been waiting for me all this time. My heart was intrigued. Was it a coincidence that he just happened to be sitting there? I had never seen him before yet there was something about him. Outrageous thoughts began to overtake me. I wanted him to run to me, to hold me in his arms. He had this look about him – this ‘je ne sais quoi’ – something alluring, something enticing and appealing, that radiated from inside his spirit as if it was connected directly to my own. I couldn’t turn back now.

The decision was made. She walked toward me – tentatively at first. I could hear her heartbeat. She didn’t know it yet, but it was beating for me. It had always beaten for me as mine had for her. She wanted me to turn my head toward her, to meet her gaze but at the same time she was reticent. I respected that. I could wait a few moments more, although nothing inside me wanted to wait any longer. The earth sounded her approach to me. I looked into the water, restraining myself from jumping to my feet. She would know the exact moment of truth because I would tell her – I would tell her from my spirit to hers, “Come to me. Come to me.”

The Wonder - Part III

I was breathless, but not out of breath. In some ways it seemed like the culmination of my adventure - something tugged at my soul – something I didn’t understand, but was about to. I knew it was just the beginning, perhaps the end of one journey but the start of a passage, an understanding, the fulfillment of a promise. I felt understood. I felt loved. Purpose was speaking to me, calling me out of the shell I had survived in. I felt like a flower, opening up for the first time. Someone was looking into me, seeing me, seeing in me what I never saw in myself. The unveiling of hope was revealing itself to me. I laid down in the grass. It was covered in dew, but I welcomed it. It made me feel alive. My spirit was alert as if it had heard something I hadn’t – a concerto playing for me, written for me and only me. It felt like a new beginning.

She wrapped herself in the grass. The dew caressed her with the tears of my love; the joy of my heart enveloped her. She lavished in it. It was refreshing. It was a moment I couldn’t interrupt. She’d come. This very moment inevitable. That’s why she had made the journey. I could wait a little longer; I sent my song of love to her, carried on the wings of the birds. My heart swelled at the fullness of love that was emergent in her. She had never dreamed of this kind of love and I wanted nothing more than give her everything I had to give. Gratitude began to fill and surround her – she would never know fully that it was I who was grateful that she embraced the gift I gave her – it was in the giving that love grew.

I felt satisfied and grateful as if the greatest gift had been bestowed upon me. It was in those moments that I realized that I had been walking in a shroud of weariness before I set out on this walk, before I came to lay myself beneath the sky. Heaven seemed to be speaking to me. I had never known this comfort. There were no words to express how touched I was. I wanted to stay there in that moment and never let go, but no – there was more to come. I felt strong, yet weak. I didn’t want to move but I felt compelled to get up. It was as if I had found a treasure map and had been relishing in the find of the map and not the treasure. I was overcome by tears. I had never known this kind of joy. Something was growing inside me.

The Wait - Part II

Her fragrance delivered her before her shadow cast itself over the hilltop. She didn’t see me. She sensed me though. She began to feel mesmerized, captivated by a mysterious passion she would not be able to release without me. I was the key. Before her body crossed the peak, her spirit recognized my presence. Before she became aware, it was already responding to me, seeking me, longing for me. I had planned it that way from the beginning. Understand – my longing for her, my yearning for her, was far greater and overwhelming than hers for me. There was something about her, a combination of virtues and values that were unique to her. Her heart wasn’t the only thing I wanted. I longed for her love. I wanted to be embraced by all of her – her heart, her soul, her mind – with all the strength she possessed. I had been waiting so very long, yet – she was worth the wait.

There was something powerful calling me to hasten my last few steps. My legs were weak, but not from the climb. It felt like one of those dreams when you find yourself running toward something with everything in you, yet your legs don’t seem to be moving. The summit of the hill seemed so far away, yet merely steps separated us. My heart, soul, and mind – every part of my existence needed to see what was on the other side. It felt as if I had spent my entire life on the journey to this very place – but it was only in these minutes that I sensed an urgency to be where I was going. I yearned for something that was on the other side, suddenly that longing felt as if it had been there since before my life began. I needed something and I didn’t know what it was, but I knew I’d find it on the other side. A revelation of something I had been searching for without understanding was about to be unveiled.

A symphony of life announced her appearance. Everything in creation applauded her. The wind blew my kisses through her hair and planted my words of love into her ears. She breathed deeply and sighed, filling herself with my love. A new life began in her that very moment. Her beauty left me breathless. I knew her before she knew me. It was as if I had only heard of her loveliness, as if I had only seen an artist’s rendition, but as she began to take those next steps my spirit was taken aback – she was breathtaking. The reflection of the sun on the water danced in her eyes and mirrored my love for her. Her gaze fell upon me like the morning dew glistening at daybreak. My spirit called out to hers.

The Climb - Part 1

I was sitting on the bank of the river, beneath the willow tree. The branches cascaded gracefully around me, sweeping me into their gentle embrace as the breeze floated through them, bringing them to life. The water rushing over the rocks serenaded me with its song as I waited for her. I knew she was coming. I had been anticipating her arrival for some time. I watched the reflection of the sun beaming off the surface of the water like dancing stars twinkling about. Were they waiting for her also?

It was a warm day but not unbearably hot, just the kind of day I love. I felt drawn to walk – not my usual path. For some reason, I felt adventurous that day. I felt a calling, as if the cool breeze was delivering me an engraved invitation to linger in the midst of creation. Was it the thought of sitting at the river’s edge that made me thirst so? As I walked up the crest of the hill, I realized that it wasn’t a natural thirst. I wasn’t parched by any means, yet there was something inside me that needed to be quenched, an unnameable thirst. I could hear the sound of the water – it awakened a need in me. I knew I was close when I saw the top of the willow tree. I would sit beneath it and breathe everything in.

I could sense her approaching. She had plans. She was seeking comfort - from what – she didn’t know. Through all her senses, I was drawing her near to me. I knew she felt it. She just didn’t realize that it was me. How could she? I knew she thirsted for something that would satiate, something that would satisfy, something everlasting. The sweet smell of the irises carried her up the mount. My heart smiled within. Every beat thumped within me increasing my exhilaration. It would only be a matter of time before she’d be mine. She didn’t know I had been waiting there for her for what seemed an eternity.

As I climbed up the hill, the willow became more lifelike with every step. It beckoned me. I felt drawn. My heart called out to me in a way I’ve never experienced before, as if the summit of love was waiting to embrace my arrival. The walk was steeper than I had anticipated. I wasn’t tired from the climb – it was more like a sweet exhaustion caused by an unknown anticipation that had overcome me. My senses were heightened, finely attuned to creation’s calling. “Come to me, you who are weary and burdened.” I wasn’t weary or burdened in a natural way. There had been something missing – something in a place I couldn’t name. “Come to me. Come to me,” everything around me whispered – not into my ears but into every part of my being – parts I was just then becoming aware that I had.

Shalom and Lehitraot for Now

It’s pretty safe to say that most of the bears in Canada have now gone into hibernation. Most people think that bears sleep without waking during the period of their hibernation – this is not the case. They do, from time to time, wake up and move about. In fact, female bears give birth during this season to cubs who – believe it or not – weigh only a few pounds. She nurses them while she "slumbers” and short months later they enter into a season of life and of nature.

Although I’m not a bear, I am Canadian and more importantly than being Canadian I am a Believer. There are times in the life of a Believer when God calls them away for a season – not to slumber, or hibernate, from the rest of the world, but to seek Him with all one’s heart, soul, and strength. And while we are called to love and seek Him this way always – there are times when private time is needed. God has called me to join Him in a season in which He is going to “nurse” me – nurture me and our relationship - and prepare me for the spring – a new season.

Before He takes me and hides me under His wing for this time, He’s bringing me back to Israel. He’ll fill my mind with fond memories and innumerable teachings, my heart with love and compassion, and strengthen me with His Manna. I am desperate for this time with Him, a time to do nothing but focus on our relationship – our love.

I will not be tending to Unveiling Hope during this time with God. I do however, leave you with a blessing and prayer from my heart – a prayer that, undoubtedly, the God of Abraham, Isaac and Jacob desires to honour. Shalom and lehitraot for now.

“The Lord bless you and keep you; the Lord make His face shine upon you, and be gracious to you; the Lord lift up His countenance upon you, and give you peace.” Num. 6:24-26 NKJV.

Bad Seed Grows

I’m not much of a gardener. I love gardens; I just don’t have the patience to wait for growth. I have a tendency to focus on the weeds growing while I’m waiting on the good stuff.

I have this mental picture of the “old” me – a garden of sorts – filled with briers and dandelions with the odd daisy pushing up here and there. I don’t know why I ever visit that garden, but I do.

The Greatest Landscaper of all creation has been weeding out my garden for several years now. You’d think a person who has a professional “gardener” come in would just stop fussing and just enjoy the scenery, but no … not me. Of course, I do appreciate the garden and I certainly see the work He’s done, but to tell you the truth, I seem to spend far too much time focussing of the little weeds that seem to sprout from time to time.

That old serpent loves nothing more than to scatter bad seed in our fertile minds and then sit back as hope that we’ll choose to get out the watering can. Every gardener will tell you weeds will grow. You can spend hours and hours lovingly caring for your garden, but the next morning – or maybe the following day - you’ll surely find a little sprout that doesn’t belong there. The enemy will always sow bad seed, and bad seed grows. But having a weed or two in your garden doesn’t mean your flowers won’t blossom or your plants won’t produce fruit.

God has worked so hard healing the soil and sowing; He seems to be happy with His work. Maybe I should just sit a spell - rest in Him - appreciate His work and let Him worry about what He plants.

“I am the vine; you are the branches. If a man remains in me and I in him, he will bear much fruit; apart from me you can do nothing.” John 15:5 NIV.

The Calm in the Storm

 I’ve been going through some memories – searching for times when strength and peace seemed to come with much more ease.  It those “remember when” moments that a person’s faith is strengthened by the courage that carried them once upon a time.

In less than one month, I'll be back in this very place. The calmest and most relaxing moments of my trip to Israel last year was a boat ride on the Sea of Galilee. The water was calm; the weather was warm and sunny – a perfect day. I began thinking about the night the disciples were on the boat and a storm began. Jesus – walking on the water – came to their rescue. Peter however mustered all the courage he could and took a step in faith.

When the skipper stopped the boat I began looking out upon the water. I wondered, if a storm kicked up right this minute, would I step out? Would I be brave enough not to take my eyes off him – even for a second?

He gave me a revelation on the Sea. He showed me that I don’t have to be on the Sea of Galilee to walk on water during a storm. Life is filled with opportunities to practice. When the winds of life are blowing and the waters grow rough, I know what I need to do. Today, I may take only a few steps, but I know that during the next storm, I’ll take a few more, and a few more the storm after that as I learn to focus on the Calm in the storm.

“Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own,” Matt. 6:34.